Fireworks display on weekends. 5 pillows. Good-feel 80's and 90's songs. Good-fitting shoes. Unexpected visits early in the morning. Lara Fabian's je suis malade. Tumbler. Good-read paperbacks on lazy days. Razor-back tops. Fancy papers. Stuffed-panda and white bear. My hair in the morning. Clinique's "sun-kissed" blush-on. A new pen. Vision of a sunset. Mango-flavored drinks and cakes. Gboy's drawings. 2320H. Cats, my cats. 2-hour nap in the aftern0ons. Ankle-lenght black socks. Long walks around Makati. Old letters. Tuesdays. Riding the tube [minus the rush]. Streamline of a sunray through the clouds. Dark-hued nail polish. Long baths. Gray scarf [pashmina]. Mobile phone. Pink piggy keychain that squells "oink" when you push a butt0n on its head [some days i wish it says "ribbit" for a change]. Black book journal. Immaculately clean nails. Having the house to myself. Travelling. Carusso handkerchief. Pay days. Perfect-fitting jeans [jag]. 24th day of the 9th month.
Friends who stayed.
Life's uncanny way of teaching lessons.
Well-deserved respect.
Everything in general.
Nothing in particular...
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Patay-Sindi
I'm not a big fan of cigarette-smoking, but i do smoke. Heck! I prefer smoking better than drinking booze. [ok, so maybe that makes me a fan!] What gives?!
I've come across this vice about a year ago. [this was the roadtrip-that-ended-in-tagaytay scene where my fellow tripster asked me to light a stick for him as he has his hands full behind the wheel. I suppose i found it cool. Smoking while driving along the traffic of SLEX. Way better than drinking and driving. You court trouble that way. N0T COOL!] Can't say i'm proud of that [smoking as a vice] but atleast i'm not addicted to it. Not yet. [maybe i won't be. Di ko naman hinahanap!] On average, i smoke, like, once a month? And i try to stick to a pack of 20's when i'm out for the night. [i don't stick to one brand, though.]
Marlboro Lights : the first stick i tried. I had an instant liking to it. I think it has just the right taste to it. Not too strong. Perfect for starters.
Marlboro Reds : i don't like it one bit. Too strong. Made me dizzy at first puff. Took me what, 5? 10minutes to finish off a stick. Never tried it again!
Then there's Winston Lights : tastes rather dull. Winston Reds : taste much better.
One of my officcemate [past] smokes Marlboro Menthols : after which, i had this urge of n0t wanting to smoke anym0re! [i wondered why.] The feeling didn't last, though. Some say menthols aren't that good. Idk. Phillips and Winston Ice taste just about the same to me!
Once, a friend suggested i try Gudang [menthol]. Sweet filter. Contains marijuana [rumor]. Stick crackles as you puff. "Like smoking firecrackers!" [my cousin exclaimed during our first joint]. A fancy cigarette! Pricy as well, and way much better than Dunhill Frost [no point of comparison actually, it was just a disappointment!]
Well, its been over a month since i puffed my last stick. I'm not craving for some. [but i'm sure to if i have one!] I guess this disqualifies me as a candidate to such addicti0n, n0t yet at least. I could still claim i never liked smoking and would still get nauseous everytime i smell 'em from others. I also wonder [still] why people DO smoke?! A friend once said : "its to be cool!" I think thats lame and untrue. Smoking isn't cool! Smoking Is Dangerous To One's Health! That's according to government warning.
Now i wonder why the majority doesn't heed this!? [i know i don't!] ~.~
I've come across this vice about a year ago. [this was the roadtrip-that-ended-in-tagaytay scene where my fellow tripster asked me to light a stick for him as he has his hands full behind the wheel. I suppose i found it cool. Smoking while driving along the traffic of SLEX. Way better than drinking and driving. You court trouble that way. N0T COOL!] Can't say i'm proud of that [smoking as a vice] but atleast i'm not addicted to it. Not yet. [maybe i won't be. Di ko naman hinahanap!] On average, i smoke, like, once a month? And i try to stick to a pack of 20's when i'm out for the night. [i don't stick to one brand, though.]
Marlboro Lights : the first stick i tried. I had an instant liking to it. I think it has just the right taste to it. Not too strong. Perfect for starters.
Marlboro Reds : i don't like it one bit. Too strong. Made me dizzy at first puff. Took me what, 5? 10minutes to finish off a stick. Never tried it again!
Then there's Winston Lights : tastes rather dull. Winston Reds : taste much better.
One of my officcemate [past] smokes Marlboro Menthols : after which, i had this urge of n0t wanting to smoke anym0re! [i wondered why.] The feeling didn't last, though. Some say menthols aren't that good. Idk. Phillips and Winston Ice taste just about the same to me!
Once, a friend suggested i try Gudang [menthol]. Sweet filter. Contains marijuana [rumor]. Stick crackles as you puff. "Like smoking firecrackers!" [my cousin exclaimed during our first joint]. A fancy cigarette! Pricy as well, and way much better than Dunhill Frost [no point of comparison actually, it was just a disappointment!]
Well, its been over a month since i puffed my last stick. I'm not craving for some. [but i'm sure to if i have one!] I guess this disqualifies me as a candidate to such addicti0n, n0t yet at least. I could still claim i never liked smoking and would still get nauseous everytime i smell 'em from others. I also wonder [still] why people DO smoke?! A friend once said : "its to be cool!" I think thats lame and untrue. Smoking isn't cool! Smoking Is Dangerous To One's Health! That's according to government warning.
Now i wonder why the majority doesn't heed this!? [i know i don't!] ~.~
Friday, August 14, 2009
Food Porn (1/3)
i was making balik-tanaw with the house of my childhood (in lorenzo village). i miss the meals in the long table with two equally long stools sandwiching it.
breakfast : mum would always prepare this! we’d have fried rice with egg. or instant noodles. sometimes, champorado. or "pinakas" (dried fish) for ulam. then coffee for adults and chocolate drinks for us kids. i'm sure there were a lot more in the menu which varied depending on what’s available. i don't really remember. but i do remember this...
one morning (sometime before 1992), napaaga ako ng gising. i sneaked in to the dining area while mum was preparing the table. i noticed two tall plastic glass with a spoon sticking out on one of the glasses. (these would be coffee and the chocolate concoction for us kids : "milo" [or was it "ovaltine"?]) surely, one of the glass has got to have a mixture of chocolate, milk and sugar (all in powder). and being a kid with a "sweet-tooth", i had a great tendency to "pasay" these stuff. (so do my other siblings would, for sure!). what a treat. tulog pa silang lahat! so i'll have it all to myself, i thought. i crept up to the table as soon as mum turned her back.
haha! i grabbed the glass with the spoon and scooped a mouthful of its content. in my haste, i failed to notice the color and smell of whats in that glass, and so i was disgusted to taste the bitterness of coffee in my mouth. not sweet chocolate!
ack! it was embarrassing! not only was i caught red-handed with that sneaky deed, i got duped pa by taking in the wrong treat. (mum and pop's coffee)
why of why did mum choose to use that glass instead of a mug?!
later, to cover for my mishap, i told the story to the whole family over breakfast. we all laughed about it! i was teased by my siblings but thankfully, mum was more amused than pissed at me.
lesson learned : not to do it again! (instead, attack the ones na nasa "garapon" pa! that way, siguradong "milo" [or "ovaltine"] na talaga ang mapapasay ko!)
breakfast : mum would always prepare this! we’d have fried rice with egg. or instant noodles. sometimes, champorado. or "pinakas" (dried fish) for ulam. then coffee for adults and chocolate drinks for us kids. i'm sure there were a lot more in the menu which varied depending on what’s available. i don't really remember. but i do remember this...
one morning (sometime before 1992), napaaga ako ng gising. i sneaked in to the dining area while mum was preparing the table. i noticed two tall plastic glass with a spoon sticking out on one of the glasses. (these would be coffee and the chocolate concoction for us kids : "milo" [or was it "ovaltine"?]) surely, one of the glass has got to have a mixture of chocolate, milk and sugar (all in powder). and being a kid with a "sweet-tooth", i had a great tendency to "pasay" these stuff. (so do my other siblings would, for sure!). what a treat. tulog pa silang lahat! so i'll have it all to myself, i thought. i crept up to the table as soon as mum turned her back.
haha! i grabbed the glass with the spoon and scooped a mouthful of its content. in my haste, i failed to notice the color and smell of whats in that glass, and so i was disgusted to taste the bitterness of coffee in my mouth. not sweet chocolate!
ack! it was embarrassing! not only was i caught red-handed with that sneaky deed, i got duped pa by taking in the wrong treat. (mum and pop's coffee)
why of why did mum choose to use that glass instead of a mug?!
later, to cover for my mishap, i told the story to the whole family over breakfast. we all laughed about it! i was teased by my siblings but thankfully, mum was more amused than pissed at me.
lesson learned : not to do it again! (instead, attack the ones na nasa "garapon" pa! that way, siguradong "milo" [or "ovaltine"] na talaga ang mapapasay ko!)
Friday, August 7, 2009
BLUERAY
eksena ito during my stay in manila..
one day, napagtripan lang bumili ng pirated dvd sa baclaran. 3 for 100php. (ayos! pwedi na) super cheap huh!
naitanong ko nga sa batang taga benta na panay ang bida sa kanyang mga goods.
"migo, sigurado ok kopya neto ha? as in klaro naman ba?"
to which he proudly replied ; "oo ti, maganda kuha nian. klarong-klaro! 'bluri' copy yan eh!"
*toink*
naisip ko : paanu naging 'clear' ang 'blurry'? aber? binanatan ko nga ; "pukingna, ako ba niloloko mo? paano naging klaro ang 'blurry' ha?!"
the moment i said it, i saw the brand logo, it say's : "BLU-RAY"! (blueray, blu-ray, blurry, bluri)
araynaku!
ganito pala tayong mga pilipino ano? pronounced as spelled, spelled as pronounced. (in this case) spelled right, prounounced wrong. addict!
nalagay ako sa nakakatawang sitwasyon. to which the boy looked offended, not understanding the hilarity of my paratang. sad! hindi niya naintindihan, ako ngayon ang napahiya. what's worse is the realization that : wala na bang natototohang tama ang mga bata sa eskwelahan ngayon?
ang daming honest-mistakes, pagkakamaling ang daling i-overlook.
sa pananalita (e.g. five = payb), sa isip (eh anu naman kung ganyan ang pagkakabigkas, pinoy tayo, hindi dayuhan!) at sa gawa (hahayaan ang maling kasanayan).
if being a Filipino is an excuse for such a mistake, then its no wonder lugmok pa rin tayo sa kung saan tayo ngayon. hindi naman masamang magbago ah, to educate ourselves, to better ourselves kahit na sa simpleng paraan lamang katulad ng pananalita. dahil hindi nakaka-aliw pakinggan ang mga salitang hindi nabibigkas ng tama. lalo na kung ito'y salitang dayuhan. needless to say, nakakalito.
kaya, para iwas pusoy, stop piracy! don't buy pirated dvds! nakakalito. nakakabobo.
peace out! ~.~
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
selfishness
i (still) believe its (always) better to give than to receive.
pero, nakanampucha naman, its no good when you have nothing to give! don't you just hate it paghinihingan ka, of time, a listening ear, or some other worldly material and you can't readily provide?
that's the time it sucks to be the one on the giving end. because, although rejection or being denied of something is a terrible feeling, it still doesn't beat not being able to provide..
isipin mo na lang, may batang paslit na nagmamalimus, and since you're feeling generous, dudukot ka sa iyong bulsa, only to find out that you only have enough coins left : pamasahe pauwi.. so you walk on feeling guilty for not being able to give alms.
for as long as i can remember, i've always hated being asked for something, anything. honestly, because i'm really selfish by nature. personally, i've three selfish reasons :
pressure : because once hiningan ka, you're always expected to give! if you can't (for whatever reason), you're the bad guy. and when you do give, almost always, its never enough! (a little bit more perhaps?!)
fear of criticism : takot akong laitin ang effort ko to give. this doesn't happen all the time, but it happens and its a bull-crappy feeling. making you regret you ever took the effort to give!
helplessness : i detest this most of all. the feeling that you've given it your all and still it isn't enough.
it was always easy to do the asking, but never have i experienced finding it easy to do the giving. especially when its beyond your power to give.
so i make a habit of providing without being asked. (meaning : when i feel like it!) making sure na kung nagbibigay nga ako, yun ay kusang-loob. not dahil hiningan ako, or napilitan magbigay. i find it rewarding this way.
selfishness defines generosity. still, its better to give than to receive, of course, when you have enough of everything to give! otherwise, forget it. my point being : "thank you" means nothing if its not heartfelt. ~.~
pero, nakanampucha naman, its no good when you have nothing to give! don't you just hate it paghinihingan ka, of time, a listening ear, or some other worldly material and you can't readily provide?
that's the time it sucks to be the one on the giving end. because, although rejection or being denied of something is a terrible feeling, it still doesn't beat not being able to provide..
isipin mo na lang, may batang paslit na nagmamalimus, and since you're feeling generous, dudukot ka sa iyong bulsa, only to find out that you only have enough coins left : pamasahe pauwi.. so you walk on feeling guilty for not being able to give alms.
for as long as i can remember, i've always hated being asked for something, anything. honestly, because i'm really selfish by nature. personally, i've three selfish reasons :
pressure : because once hiningan ka, you're always expected to give! if you can't (for whatever reason), you're the bad guy. and when you do give, almost always, its never enough! (a little bit more perhaps?!)
fear of criticism : takot akong laitin ang effort ko to give. this doesn't happen all the time, but it happens and its a bull-crappy feeling. making you regret you ever took the effort to give!
helplessness : i detest this most of all. the feeling that you've given it your all and still it isn't enough.
it was always easy to do the asking, but never have i experienced finding it easy to do the giving. especially when its beyond your power to give.
so i make a habit of providing without being asked. (meaning : when i feel like it!) making sure na kung nagbibigay nga ako, yun ay kusang-loob. not dahil hiningan ako, or napilitan magbigay. i find it rewarding this way.
selfishness defines generosity. still, its better to give than to receive, of course, when you have enough of everything to give! otherwise, forget it. my point being : "thank you" means nothing if its not heartfelt. ~.~
Sunday, August 2, 2009
4 a.m
i had the weirdest dream last night. It involved aliens, trains, and the cast from grey's anatomy. It was crazy!
I woke up at 4am, curled up in a ball and shivering, feeling super scared. What was i afraid of? Death? Being eaten alive? Or was it being alone?
Like it maters!?
It was just a dream, yet i woke up feeling like it followed me even in wakefulness. Well, atleast the scared part. Funny thing is, i had tried to capture that feeling after i've realized that it was just a dream and i'm alone in a bed big enough for two, and it was dark and i had to turn off the fan because i was cold and i had to pee.
I think it was actually the urge to pee that woke me up.
*toink*
I woke up at 4am, curled up in a ball and shivering, feeling super scared. What was i afraid of? Death? Being eaten alive? Or was it being alone?
Like it maters!?
It was just a dream, yet i woke up feeling like it followed me even in wakefulness. Well, atleast the scared part. Funny thing is, i had tried to capture that feeling after i've realized that it was just a dream and i'm alone in a bed big enough for two, and it was dark and i had to turn off the fan because i was cold and i had to pee.
I think it was actually the urge to pee that woke me up.
*toink*
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